16 The Struggle

For a moment we gazed at each other’s faces, and then—why I know not, though I suppose it was the instinct that often guides us in moments of the acutest peril—I reached out both hands and grasped him by the throat. The cry that was rising to his lips was crushed back in my grip, and the knife fell from his teeth into the water. He seized me also, but I had a great advantage, for I stood on the bottom, while he floated in the water.

In that supreme moment there was no time to think of mercy, and for once I sought human life with the ferocity of a wild beast. Pressing with all my might I drove the man down beneath the water. Even as he sank his face was ghastly with fright and the eyeballs were protruding. But still I pressed him down. The water bubbled over his head where he sank, and he writhed about in the stream, but I held him with a strength that was unnatural and irresistible.

Halftrigger and his companions were calling to each other not far away, but I lay back against the cliff, and I felt the muscles swelling like whipcords in my arms as my fingers sank into the throat of that man who would never draw the breath of life again. There was no need of such exertion, as he was fast drowning, but it was the result of the excited impulse I had received. At last he ceased to struggle, and the body swung limply with the current in my hands.

Holding to that ghastly thing I cowered back in the bushes, for the danger had not yet passed. Halftrigger and his men were coming back down the stream.

I dared not let the body go, for I feared it would float to the surface and be seen by Halftrigger. But after the deed was done and the impulse that caused it was over I was seized with a sudden horror and repulsion. I shivered and the shiver did not come of the water. Clutching that body I felt as if I had my hands thrust in a grave, and only the love of life prompted me to retain my hold.

Halftrigger passed near me again on his way down stream, and the others followed close behind. When they had gone some yards beyond me I pushed the body among the bushes, where it stuck, and then I washed my hands in the flowing water.

Halftrigger and his men went perhaps fifty yards down the stream and paused there, as if undecided. “What do you think of it, Captain?” asked Spanish Pete.

“Looks ez if we would hev to give up the chase,” Halftrigger replied. “It beats me how he escaped us.”

“I think, Captain,” said Spanish Pete, “that my theory that he is drowned and is sticking somewhere among the rocks or roots is correct.”

“’Pears like it,” replied Halftrigger. “I guess we’d better quit the water. Tain’t wuth while to hunt here forever. Are you all here?”

There was a minute of silence and then Halftrigger called in a loud voice for Kurtz.

Kurtz was the man whom I had drowned. Halftrigger waited a little and then called again loudly and impatiently. Of course, there was no answer.

“What’s become o’ the fellow?” exclaimed Halftrigger.

They had gone near the shore and were standing where the water did not reach above their waists.

Halftrigger hailed the men on the bank and asked if Kurtz had come ashore. They replied in the negative.

“Maybe he’s drowned,” said one of the men, “just as the prisoner was. Maybe there’s a whirlpool or something of the kind here.”

Halftrigger did not reply, and I inferred that the suggestion had made an impression upon him.

“Shall we leave him, Captain?” asked Spanish Pete.

“I guess we must,” said Halftrigger, with a kind of growl. “Ef Kurtz is drowned he’s drowned, an’ nuthin’ kin undrown him. Ef he ain’t drowned he kin come on and jine us. Good God, what’s that?”

I heard a splashing in the water, and Halftrigger dragged something to the surface.

“By the great horn spoon,” he exclaimed, “it’s Kurtz, and he’s dead!”

The men clustered together, and the confused murmur of their voices came up the stream. My carelessness had betrayed me. The current had gradually and noiselessly drawn the body from the bushes, and it had floated with the stream until it struck against Halftrigger himself.

“Lads!” exclaimed Halftrigger, swearing a great oath, “Kurtz didn’t come to his death altogether by drownin’. Look, here’s the mark o’ fingers ’roun’ his throat. He’s been strangled to death!”

As if by a common impulse, the men began to reascend the stream, and I saw that it was not a time for me to linger. I dived again and swam up stream as fast and as long as I could. I came close to the bank, up which I instantly clambered. I made so little noise that the men did not see me until I stood on the summit. They set up a shout, but fickle fortune, which had so often been against me, was now in my favor.

The night had turned darker, and the woods lining the river were dense. I sprang into the shadow and darted off at right angles from the stream. Only the man who stood on my side of the river was in a position to give chase, and either I was too swift for him or he was rather wary about overtaking me alone, for I soon left him out of sight. He fired one shot at me, which whistled wide of the mark, and then I dived into the deep woods.

I had but one idea, and that was to get away from the dangerous vicinity of the desperadoes. I determined to keep straight ahead; wherever that might lead me. I had seen enough of the forest and wilderness to know that one may wander about a zigzag course or even in a circle when he thinks he is following a straight line, and against this I guarded. I guided myself by one of the planets, which shone with a fixed light low on the horizon, and pushed forward with it always before me.

I ran at the top of my speed as long as my breath lasted, and then I confined myself to a walk only long enough to recover the lost breath.

Breaking into a run again I soon came to the edge of the forest. I paused there for a moment to listen for the sound of my pursuers’ footsteps. But I heard nothing to indicate that they were near, and I felt sure I had shaken them off, and moreover, that they would be unable to follow me in the night through the thick woods.

The plain appeared to be two or three miles broad. Beyond it rose a low range of mountains, wooded to the summit. To follow the course marked out by my star would lead me directly across the plain and I determined to follow it. The plain would afford me no hiding place, but even should the men by any chance trace me to the edge of the wood I believed that I had sufficient lead to gain the mountains far before them.

So I entered the open and ran straight towards the mountains, adopting the long, loping stride which I had seen Pike use with so much effect on the prairie. Excitement, the hope of saving my life, buoyed me up; and I felt strong enough for many more hours of exertion. Occasionally, as I ran along, I looked back, but saw nothing in the dim light.

I soon crossed the plain and reached the first slopes of the mountain. Day was just breaking as I cast myself at the foot of a big tree for a short rest. A slender bar of light appeared in the east. It broadened and the horizon was spangled with gold. The great round globe of the sun came peeping up from behind the earth, and soon his rays fell like millions of little golden arrows over mountain and plain.

I now had a good view of the plain, which extended to north and south further than the eye could see. On the other side was the belt of forest from which I had come, and I could mark the very place at which I had left it. There was nothing visible on the plain, and I felt assured that Halftrigger and his men had been unable to follow me.

Rising again, I began the ascent of the mountain. It was much broken up by ravines and gulches, but I clambered across them, and in less than an hour was at the summit. Beyond was a country similar to that I had left behind. Plain and low range of mountains alternated.

I sat down on a rock while I examined the country, and I decided to go about half way down the further side of the mountain and seek rest and sleep in some hiding place there. My clothing had dried long since, but I felt cold.

When I rose to my feet numberless pains shot through me and racked my bones. My head began to swim around, and I was sickened by a nausea. Over-exertion, I thought, and concluded to rest a little longer. I sat down again on the stone and felt better, though the symptoms did not depart entirely. Then I got up again, but I found myself so weak that I was almost exhausted by the effort. The swimming in the head and the nausea began with greater violence than before, but I summoned my will and determined not to yield.

I starred down the mountain side, but I reeled about like a drunken man. My sight grew dim, and I was seized with a fit of shivering. I leaned against a tree for support. At my feet lay a piece of bough. I picked it up and, breaking off the twigs, used it as a walking-stick. I limped painfully along for a few yards until I came to a tree under which the turf grew soft and long. It was inviting; it looked as if it were prepared as a bed for a weary man. I tried to pass it, but the turf smiled at me, and, dropping my stick, I threw myself down upon it.

I remember looking up at the blue skies, which seemed to be waving about as if the earth were rocking in an earthquake, and then my eyes closed, and I sank into a sleep that was haunted by all the phantasmagoria of nightmare.

When I awoke the sun was hanging in the centre of the heavens, but I saw it through a red mist, and it had increased many times in size. The mountain and the trees and the plain had changed. The trees took on strange and exaggerated shapes, and the mountain was higher and steeper than it had seemed in the night.

I sprang to my feet and was surprised at my strength. I had feared that I would be ill, but, pshaw! Sleep had removed the danger of that. My head was no longer heavy. It was as light as air, and I felt the hot blood leaping in my veins. I thrilled with a strange exhilaration. I felt that I was capable of high and lofty deeds, and longed for the opportunity. Though I was alone in the wilderness, I felt very glad that morning of my strength and hope. I sang a verse of Starboard Sam’s favorite song of the Constitution and the Guerriere, and I followed that with Halftrigger’s pirate stave.

I found my stick where I had thrown it when I lay down to sleep, and resumed the journey down the mountain side. But it was not necessary to drag myself along now. My feet were as light as my head, and I noticed that I was stepping very high, which I took as another proof of the strength that I had found so wonderfully. With what life-giving potion had the good fairies dosed me as I slept? I felt so vigorous and so bold that I could have faced Halftrigger and his whole band, and in excess of spirits I roared out the old sea songs again, and all the other songs that I could remember.

The slope of the mountain on this side was very gradual and the journey to the plain was long. When half of it was done I sat down on a rock to decide what course to pursue when I reached the plain. But my brain refused to be troubled with such a trifle. Somehow I could not collect my thoughts. Ideas and impressions passed through my mind, but they came and went so fast that I was bewildered by their variety.

There was a rustling sound among the boughs of a tree overhead, and I saw a large, tawny animal gazing at me. He was crouched down on the bough apparently ready to spring. I had never seen a mountain lion before, but I knew from descriptions I had heard that this was an animal of that kind. But I felt no fear. Rather, I rejoiced at the opportunity to show my strength and courage.

I began to sing Halftrigger’s pirate song at the top of my voice. I shouted out:

Then I grasped my stick in both hands. I rushed forward, and leaping up to reach him, struck at the animal with all my might. I laughed in exultation when he sprang from the bough, and casting back one look of affright, fled down the mountain side.

“Thus will I drive my enemies before me!” I exclaimed grandiloquently, shaking my stick at the disappearing form of the animal.

After this exploit I pursued a more leisurely course down the mountain. Though I had eaten nothing for many hours I felt no hunger and wondered why it was so.

Presently I noticed with some alarm that my strength seemed to be abating. My pulse was not so high and my spirits fell also. But I thought it would soon pass and I began to sing again. When I was half through the verse my voice failed and my knees began to quiver with weakness.

A cold, shivering fit came over me, and I sat down, hoping that it would soon pass. The color of the skies had changed from a bright blue to a dark gray. There was no longer any sunshine, and as my cold and weakness increased all my courage and high spirits slipped away from me.

The revulsion was sudden, but it was complete. In my weakness and loneliness I felt like a little child. I trembled all over and a cold sweat broke out upon me. I fell into a state of collapse, physically as well as mentally, and sank nerveless upon the ground. I lay there until some traces of resolution came back to me, when I dragged myself painfully up again and made another effort to advance.

In this effort I was assisted by a great fear which lay hold of me. What if my pursuers were near? The thought affected me as danger had never affected me before. Was my courage giving way after enduring so much? I resolved that I would not be a coward, but even as I summoned my courage I glanced fearfully back up the mountain. That set me trembling again and I seized my stick and started in a limp and halting way down the slope.

But my fear grew as I proceeded. Despite myself I looked back again and again, and my dim sight created strange shapes behind me. I touched my hand to my forehead. It was hot and the veins were swollen, but my strength seemed to grow again and I began to run.

As I ran all the events of the night before passed in my mind. Again I saw Halftrigger and his cutthroats swimming about in the river after me with knives in, their teeth. Such men would never abandon the pursuit. They might even now be close behind me. What noise was that?

The world was spinning around, and I was so dizzy that I could barely keep my footing, but I turned for one glance. I saw a gigantic figure dart from behind a tree and other figures followed it.

“Halftrigger!” I cried aloud, and, borne up by an unnatural strength, I ran like the wind down the mountain. But the men followed. They ran as fast as I. They shouted to me, and their words stung me like taunts. After so many escapes and so much suffering, they had overtaken me again, but I would not fall into their hands without a struggle.

The earth was spinning around faster than ever, but I sped on with light foot, Another swift glance over my shoulder showed that I had not gained on my pursuers, and that giant figure still led the van. They kept up a shouting, which only spurred me to greater effort. But my overtaxed muscles began to yield. The men gained upon me fast, and, though my own strength decreased, the earth now seemed to be whirling around like a newly spun top. My last remnant of strength deserted me. I was spinning around and around with the earth, and I fell senseless just as a pair of powerful hands reached out to grasp me.

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